White Spirits and cat sick Thursday.

8th November 2019

Dear Dennis,
The younglings pot of white spirit - it was an empty dried yeast tin with a plastic lid - for his art oil painting, was knocked over by a cat this morning .... it (the pot of white spirits) was on the dining room table ..... he had put the lid on, however the lid leaked and white spirit soaked through the multi newspaper layers and under the cutting board protecting the table from his paints. Oil paint doesn't run at all but the white spirit spread and covered half the polished wood table .... the house now stinks of white spirits. But at least the table is nice and shiny. One of the cats was sick, in the sink, over the washing-up I'd stacked ready to be washed..... bluly cats. I wiped the table and dried it as best I could with a roll of kitchen towel. I just looked outside and one of our cats (the big tom) is sitting on a plank of wood I'd strategically place, to dry out, near the boiler flue outlet. He looks to be asleep .... are cats affected by CO ? Uh and I've now noticed the dining table is mostly devoid of polish and is looking particularly dull - the white spirit and my vigorous drying has taken all the polish off. This is definitely one of those Thursdays. Before the brunette gets in this evening I now have to re-polish the dining table and somehow get rid of the white spirit smell from the house ... a cut onion is supposed to do the trick but how do I then get rid of the smell of onion from the dining room?

Do you have Thursdays where you are?

Kind regards (what on earth does that mean?
D6

Belfast Sinks

I trust you are well. We've not spoken for a while now although I expect you've been on holiday and sunning yourself somewhere peaceful. I suffered an embarassing episode the other day and felt I ought to warn you of the dangers as soon as possible.

First thing, the other day, my plans got hijacked.

I was told I had to collect 2 "Belfast" sinks from places around Berkshire. Blimey bloke they're heavy. The first caused a bit of a todo, as I bent to help the chap lift the sink, I didn't notice I stood on a cord from my hareem trouser leg ... yes, as I stood up, my trousers didn't; and at the same time, the wind I was holding on to, since I got out of the car, let go noisily and uncontainably at the trouser surprise. Mel and the chap trying to help me lift the sink just stared at me in disbelief. Of course I tried to laugh it off but I don't think they saw the funny side.

Upon getting out of the car when we arrive to pick up the sink, I should have feigned a problem with the car and fiddled with something mechanical around the front whilst at the same time releasing my wind gradually and in a more controlled fashion and yes, I should have hitched my new trendy "Hareem Trousers" before attempting the lift but we learn from our mistakes and eventually we manhandled the sink into the back of my car however Mel didn't speak to me all the way home.